We all have an inner voice – a constant stream of thoughts narrating our lives, offering advice, opinions, and feedback on everything we do.
But for many professionals – including me – this voice can sound like a mean soccer coach.
Our quiet, inner narrator says stuff like, “I don’t think I can do this, I’m in over my head,” or “I’m not as smart as others.”
Staggeringly, 70% of people will experience imposter syndrome – feeling unqualified for their roles despite evident success – at least once in their lives, according to a study published in the International Journal of Behavioral Science.
Research also reveals it’s not just an experience shared by early-career professionals but people right across the spectrum of working life. Seasoned leaders, entrepreneurs, and even CEOs frequently face self-doubt, often in silence.
In a global survey by KPMG, 75% of female executives admitted to having experienced imposter syndrome at some point during their careers.
It’s also troubling many women in traditionally male-dominated fields such as science, engineering, technology and health sciences experience imposter syndrome.
As for other genders, academic research shows few differences. However, it’s an open secret we men rarely drop our guard.
So, what’s wrong with these stories we tell ourselves?
The core issue is limiting beliefs are self-fulfilling. Over time, they shape how we see ourselves and what we believe is possible.
In fact, Dr. Valerie Young, psychologist and author of The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women, says they also drive behaviours that limit our potential, such as avoiding new challenges to downplaying achievements.
This silent struggle is particularly prevalent in the workplace. High-pressure environments, expectations of success, social media’s obsession with comparisons, and competition for jobs lead many professionals to suppress their self-doubt.
People can feel trapped behind a facade of confidence while privately questioning their worth. Fake it till you make it!
It’s a dangerous disconnect, where even those at the top feel isolated and fearful of being “found out” as inadequate. I’ve been there, done that and got the grey hairs!
Storytelling to the rescue
The good news is these stories we tell ourselves are not fixed. Our inner narrative can be rewritten, a positive self-image can be revived. This too is part of my story.
The first step is to embrace one deeply cathartic idea: You’re not alone.
Why does this matter? Because it helps you crush harmful narratives.
For example, I once listed off my stress inputs during a walk with a good friend. We got up to about 10 different stressors impacting me at work and in my personal life. I truly felt alone in the struggle.
“You know that’s not normal, right? my wise mate countered. "Most people have just a few stresses.” Turns out I had forgotten what should be normal. But I wasn’t alone, and it was a profound moment.
Of course, moments like this are just one part of the journey. What matters is you keep moving forward with others, rewriting your narrative one line at a time.
'Stories We Tell Ourselves' is an exciting, breakthrough keynote by Mark Jones. His message of vulnerability, courage and optimism ignites positive change. Read more here.
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